Please waste, err, take the time...

I find these emailesque questionnaires that are floating around some of the LiveJournals I haunt a little too overbearing for me to fill one out. I know this is a time of divulging gruesome details, but I still feel odd.

I love, and I have loved.
I've been used for sex.
I've fallen for the wrong people, and people not interested in me, more times than I care to tell.
I am in a very good relationship now.
I don't wish to trade that for a resumption of insecurity and naivete.
I've stolen office supplies. Heck, I ran off with a thesaurus last night, and I did that in front of my boss. I'm returning the thesaurus because it's the crappy dictionary kind; the better ones are the ones you look up the word in the back, find the number it gives you, and look at the big stacks of synonyms under the number. I probably should have looked at it first, eh?
I last got hugged and kissed on Sunday afternoon, when Maggie had to go home.
Since I am loved well, I no longer feel the desperation that would have kept me answering those questions. I'm not trying to prove anything about my love life. I'm not applying for a mortgage from the Love Bank. People stepped on me, I got tired of it, so I rolled up into a joint for a while.
Now I can discern drugs, perception, feelings, moods, responses, and people.
I am older. I'm finally starting to feel that way.
I've answered some questions, because I feel communication is important. I'm still learning how to use the LJ for that.
That's as far as I care to go with this exercise, however.

I'm working on a couple more comments for the day. More soon.

-your comments are important to us, ps/d

"Cardinals figure out water wet, get towels"

"Pope calls sex abuse crime" -front page headline of the Boston Globe, Wednesday

I want to make some comments about the recent kefauffle (kafuffle? Neither of the main online dictionaries could match the word to anything, so I guess I'm back to 'spat') in the Roman Catholic Church. Since I went to Catholic school for six years and I was an altar boy for four of those years, I know some stuff about priests.

I escaped buggery. The monsignor of my parish was assuredly boy-happy, but I guess I was a little too talkative for his proclivities. He was a right-winger anyway, so he wasn't my scene.

What galls me about the Cardinal Law scandal isn't that he's being evasive. It's not that they're going to promote him to a Vatican post to get him out of Boston before his deposition. It's not even the Church's wishy-washy response -- "we'll protect our own unless they're supremely evil". I didn't expect them to do the right thing. I grew up with Catholicism (I can't say I grew up "Catholic" since my mom is a Unitarian and my dad is as lapsed a Catholic as I am except that I did a little more research), so I didn't expect any good out of this.

However, here's what galls me.

It's a major sin, you sick fools!

These are the same cardinals that, as priests, would tell their flock they'll be taking the express train to Hell for eating a hamburger on Friday. These are the same people that moved this mortal sin completely out of the system the same day the switched from a Latin mass to a local-language-only mass. They traded mysteries for lies.

I didn't expect them to toss their own to the cops. I did think, however, they'd be worried about their immortals souls. Choosing not to cough up a sacrificial lamb, something these people know plenty about, seems out of step.

Standing up for pederasts when they won't even speak peaceably to us regular, venial sinners suggests that the Roman Catholic Church has finally rejected the Bible. It got in the way for years -- everybody from Gutenberg down showing that the dogma isn't in the book, all the Protestant yammering. Now they have exactly what they wanted -- variable Ten Commandments, Jesus the Symbol on a Wall (instead of Jesus the Jewish kid that snapped and tried to save everyone), a church without members.

At least these cardinals have each other. They'll need each other when they're burning in the Hell they've created.

I suspect the Pope didn't actually side with these fucks. He lived a hard life before he became the Pope (being the Cardinal of Krakow when Poland was a Soviet satellite couldn't have been comfortable). He probably called them in, yelled in five languages, then let them have meetings in front of him.

I left the Church in 1988. For the first time in my life, I feel a subtle vindication -- they've picked the wrong battle and it's costing them a generation of followers. They decided "thou shall not commit adultery" says nothing about kiddery. Brilliant. Kick out the honest folk and you'll have a beautiful vehicle to damnation.

This entry lost its focus. Dang. I feel insolent, full of rage. That cripples my ability to focus my thoughts. I'm angry with the Church because it never tried to accept free thinking but it was plenty happy to handle virulent wrong-doing. It's the same church that tried to stop Italian unification. If it rots, I'll be happy to dance on its grave.

I'm sorry if this pissed anyone off. I'm somewhere between annoyed and pleased.

-something bitter emerged, ps/d