I need two volunteers to lift one very heavy thing this weekend

[pseydtonne]

My parents are coming to visit for the first time in a while. They will be taking my marble table off my hands. This is very important because it's the one major item I cannot lift myself that is still in my storage locker. Once I get that out, I can clear out the remaining garbage myself and stop paying $139 each month for a hundred square feet of storage way the heck out in Methuen.

Problem: when I say I cannot lift this table, I mean I cannot put enough force through my body to get the inertia to make it separate from the floor. Thus I need two or more strong people to help me get this onto a rolling cart and then into my parents' station wagon. Thus, I'm begging.

This could be on either Saturday or Sunday. I will give you the ride there and back and buy you dinner if you'll volunteer. You'll also get to hear embarrassing stories about my childhood from my parents, which can be useful if you want to blackmail me later.

If you can help, reply to this post or call me. Remember: it's granite. It's amazingly heavy, although it's only 3 feet by 5 feet and the legs have been removed. You don't have to get it back out of the car (that's already covered).

I did lots of goofy things as a kid. Heck, buying this table was a goofy idea as an adult. Don't you want to learn more?

Comments

[itoshii-koi.livejournal.com]

I am sorry I live so far away , well and that Im incapable of lifting in my current condition....are you sure you want to keep it in one piece I am pondering the idea of leaning how to blow things up without causing a lot of damage..maybe a few well placed charges and we can bring it out in pieces....yes Im a smart ass...worse now that I have this little girl feeding off my polite center. I miss you & hope you find help this weekend.

[pseydtonne.livejournal.com]

I miss you too. However I do not wish to shatter a nearly-new dining table. I would have used a small sledge hammer, because it would feel more rewarding to break it that way.

I have found at least one willing victim. If my dad is strong enough, that may do the trick.

[dimers.livejournal.com]

I'd love to do this particular goofy thing. But I've already committed both days to my grandfather in Norwell. Um, he usually craps out early these days (not surprising, given his 86 years of age), so I could potentially help Sunday night, say 7:00 or later. Lemme know if anyone else can work with that timing.

[hermitgeecko.livejournal.com]

There is no way in hell I can move this object. I am sorry to disappoint.

[adaptively.livejournal.com]

Remember the time we tried to pick it up, failed epically, and just gave up and went out to get Italian food instead?

Yeah. That's why I'm not offering here. :\