(no subject)

[pseydtonne]

Everything went fine at the eye doctor's. My eyes are clear, my retina is gorgeous, I don't even need glasses.

Here's the kicker: she didn't see any floaters! I've had a floater in each eye since about 1999. I rarely see them and when I do they help me play "follow the bouncing ball" as I read. Thus I don't mind them. I swear I can see them right now but she didn't see them so yay!

I learned why eye doctors get all wet between the legs about diabetics: blood sugar changes make the aqueous humor (I think) increase and decrease. The net result can press against the optic nerve, rupture retinal vessels and then you catch on fire.

In order to see the depths of my eyes the doctor gave me eye drops to open up my pupils. I've never been through this process before, so lemme tell you what it's like.

The drop dilates your pupils so you look like you're tripping. You expect light would hurt and it does a little. What really hurts is that you can't focus on anything near. Thus I got bored with waiting and tried to read. I could watch my vision blur over several minutes. Within fifteen minutes I could no longer tell what the words were in my book. They looked like Punjabi characters. Suddenly my test on Linux optimization and troubleshooting was a mystical scripture.

I could still read large text more than five feet away, so I wasn't illiterate. I had sunglasses, so I put them on and took side streets to drive the ten blocks home.

Since I couldn't read books or the Internet, getting any office work done was out. I was thinking about breaking out my guitar for a few hours when Kibo woke up. He had the idea to show me the latest work on the Fields Corner subway station and I was eager to get out of the house. I slapped my UV protectors back on my eyeballs and we caught the bus to Davis Square.

As we rode the red line to Southie and then had to change to an Ashmont train at Broadway, we got to talking about the lame advertising on the T. There were no actual products in the ads: some walk for breast cancer, a walk for another cause, volunteer requests for a depression study, pitches for part-time undergrad programs. No one wants us to buy anything on the train, whereas they do when you're in the station or when you're on a subway train in New York (or even on the orange line).

"It's all volunteer and spare time stuff," I commented. "They must assume we're trust fund kids."

"The ads look like they could stay for a year or six months and not one month," Kibo replied. "They must be selling their ad space at a heavy discount."

We then got to talking about making web sites work for text-only access. Kibo uses tools to make sites pass the Bobby requirements because those rules ignore the pedantic memroy holes and focus on "this image map doesn't have a title link for the blind" and other things that actually matter. I remember how fascinating I found this stuff when I was hanging out with kestrell and saw how she had to beat things up to use them. A parser for lynx-based access and scalable fonts by percentage instead of pixels are more useful guidelines than what a lot of design plans teach.

The platform floors at Fields Corner have not been rebuilt and still look broken. The angular overhangs above the platforms are finished and they make the station look European. This looks like a spaceship hovering over Dorchester.

Then you walk down the stairs to the lobby. There are lights all over the ceiling which change colors in a loop. It's neat but I wonder how logn it'll be before the low-hanging bulbs get broken or stolen.

We then wanted to go to the 99C State store on Dot but it was closed. Kibo loves that store. Then we walked around the corner to the GameStop and I got some crap. After that we headed some with a stop at the Spike's in Davis.

My vision had mostly returned but my pupils were still dilated. Kibo explained that dilated pupils are a sign of arousal, so I looked like a sexy acid head instead of just the tiny-slit scene I'm used to having. I tried this come-on pose with a girl from Kentucky when I got on the bus and it went nicely enough.

When we got home I popped in the movie Groove. This is a flick from 2000 that is almost strictly the plot from 1978's TGIF except with trance instead of disco and GHB instead of cocaine. Also the move ends abruptly then tries to restart for no good reason. It's got the most amazing cinematography for a low-budget flick. It's got this wonderful soundtrack. It's amazingly dated with its use of MacOS 8.6 and cassettes. It's got loose plot lines all over the place. It's cute, but it stops making sense and then decides to "drop the cow" in the single most blatant way: it fades to white and stays there for five seconds, then fades into the late morning.

It reminds you of the twinks you love at parties: they come on in the most attractive way, then lose track of what they were doing and move onto the next shiny thing. I do that myself. However, I don't do it when I've got a few million dollars on the line.

Then we watched "Telezonia", an early 1970s educational flick from the Bell System that is... just... okay, it's clear to Kibo and me that Bob Odenkirk and David Cross watched this before they made their parody of Sid and Marty Krofft shows on Mr. Show, "The Altered State of Druggachusetts". Kibo then explained how this one expensive optical illusion got made.

I had a fine evening even though I couldn't read most of the time.I had to wear a hat and sunglasses in the GameStop to keep from blinding myself in the fluorescent overexposure. This let me blend in with the locals in the most amazing way. I should pull stunts like that more often. Now my day job resumes but I'm happy because I can see everything to do it.

-wow the colors... oh no the drivers, Dante

Comments

[chaggalagirl.livejournal.com]

"Kibo explained that dilated pupils are a sign of arousal" i had to explain that to sarah when she had her eyes checked about a month ago. i told her she looked sultry. i mean she usually does anyway even when she hasn't showered in four days, but ya know, moreso than usual.

[ltbloodrose.livejournal.com]

The doctor told edward_teach that uncontrolled high sugar causes crystals to form in your eyes. He said as he progressed in his treatment that his vision will improve. I remember him saying something before his diagnosis that his vision is getting worse.

[starburstlvr.livejournal.com]

"floaters"?

[pseydtonne.livejournal.com]

Ciliated clots in the aqueous humor of the eye. They look like dots or really tiny hairs floating in your field of vision.

When I first got them, I was scared. They have a pamphlet that says "chill, it's not scary." I got used to them and they faded into the woodwork of my mind.

Most of the time I do not see them. I only have one in each eye and each is near the center of vision. If I try to stare at one, I wind up chasing my eye around in circles since it is just off center. If I'm not looking at a strong light source or a very white page of paper, I can't tell they're around.

[arib.livejournal.com]

You've never had your pupils dilated until now? I had mine dilated amost every time I went to the eye doc as a kid. Admittedly, I had a lot of... interesting eye stuff going on as a tyke, so they probably wanted a good long look.